Sunday, July 24, 2011

SELF ACTUALIZATION - Dan Rodgerson

SELF ACTUALIZATION
"Self Actualization is the intrinsic growth of what is already in the organism, or more accurately, of what the organism is."
Abraham Maslow
Maslow studied healthy people, most psychologists study sick people.

The characteristics listed here are the results of 20 years of study of people who had the "full use and exploitation of talents, capacities, potentialities, etc.."

Self-actualization implies the attainment of the basic needs of physiological, safety/security, love/belongingness, and self-esteem.

Maslow's Basic Principles:

The normal personality is characterized by unity, integration, consistency, and coherence. Organization is the natural state, and disorganization is pathological.
The organism can be analyzed by differentiating its parts, but no part can be studied in isolation. The whole functions according to laws that cannot be found in the parts.
The organism has one sovereign drive, that of self-actualization. People strive continuously to realize their inherent potential by whatever avenues are open to them.
The influence of the external environment on normal development is minimal. The organism's potential, if allowed to unfold by an appropriate environment, will produce a healthy, integrated personality.
The comprehensive study of one person is more useful than the extensive investigation, in many people, of an isolated psychological function.
The salvation of the human being is not to be found in either behaviorism or in psychoanalysis, (which deals with only the darker, meaner half of the individual). We must deal with the questions of value, individuality, consciousness, purpose, ethics and the higher reaches of human nature.
Man is basically good not evil.
Psychopathology generally results from the denial, frustration or twisting of our essential nature.
Therapy of any sort, is a means of restoring a person to the path of self-actualization and development along the lines dictated by their inner nature.
When the four basic needs have been satisfied, the growth need or self-actualization need arises: A new discontent and restlessness will develop unless the individual is doing what he individually is fitted for. A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write--in short, what people can be they must be.
Characteristics of Self Actualizing People
Realistic
Realistically oriented, SA persons have a more efficient perception of reality, they have comfortable relations with it. This is extended to all areas of life. SA persons are unthreatened, unfrightened by the unknown. they have a superior ability to reason, to see the truth. They are logical and efficient.
Acceptance
Accept themselves, others and the natural world the way they are. Sees human nature as is, have a lack of crippling guilt or shame, enjoy themselves without regret or apology, they have no unnecessary inhibitions.
Spontaneity, Simplicity, Naturalness
Spontaneous in their inner life, thoughts and impulses, they are unhampered by convention. Their ethics is autonomous, they are individuals, and are motivated to continual growth.
Problem Centering
Focus on problems outside themselves, other centered. They have a mission in life requiring much energy, their mission is their reason for existence. They are serene, characterized by a lack of worry, and are devoted to duty.
Detachment: The Need for Privacy
Alone but not lonely, unflappable, retain dignity amid confusion and personal misfortunes, objective. They are self starters, responsible for themselves, own their behavior.
Autonomy: Independent of Culture and Environment
SA's rely on inner self for satisfaction. Stable in the face of hard knocks, they are self contained, independent from love and respect.
Continued Freshness of Appreciation
Have a fresh rather than stereotyped appreciation of people and things. Appreciation of the basic good in life, moment to moment living is thrilling, transcending and spiritual. They live the present moment to the fullest.
Peak experiences
"Feelings of limitless horizons opening up to the vision, the feeling of being simultaneously more powerful and also more helpless than one ever was before, the feeling of ecstacy and wonder and awe, the loss of placement in time and space with, finally, the conviction that something extremely important and valuable had happened, so that the subject was to some extent transformed and strengthened even in his daily life by such experiences." Abraham Maslow
Maslow asked his subjects to think of the most wonderful experience or experiences of their lives--the happiest moments, extatic moments, moments of rapture, perhaps from being in live, or from listening to music or suddenly "being hit" by a book or a painting or from some great creative moment. He found that people undergoing peak experiences felt more integrated, more at one with the world, more in command of their own lives, more spontaneous, less aware of space and time, more perceptive, more self determined, more playful.
Effects of peak experiences:

The removal of neurotic symptoms
A tendency to view oneself in a more healthy way
Change in one's view of other people and of one's relations with them
Change in one's view of the world
The release of creativity, spontaneity and expressiveness
A tendency to remember the experience and to try to duplicate it
A tendency to view life in general as more worthwhile.
Gemeinschaftsgefuhl
Identification, sympathy, and affection for mankind, kinship with the good, the bad and the ugly, older-brother attitude. Truth is clear to him, can see things others cannot see.

Interpersonal relations

Profound, intimate relationships with few. Capable of greater love than others consider possible. Benevolence, affection and friendliness shown to everyone.

Democratic values and attitudes
Able to learn from anyone, humble. Friendly with anyone regardless of class, education, political belief, race or color.
Discrimination: means and ends, Good and Evil
Do not confuse between means and ends. They do no do wrong. Enjoy the here and now, getting to goal--not just the result. They make the most tedious task an enjoyable game. They have their own inner moral standards (appearing amoral to others).
Philosophical, unhostile sense of humor
Jokes are teaching metaphors, intrinsic to the situation, spontaneous, can laugh at themselves, never make jokes that hurt others.
Creativity
Inborn uniqueness that carries over into everything they do, see the real and true more easily, original, inventive and less inhibited.
Resistance to enculturation: Transcendence of any particular culture
Inner detachment from culture, folkways are used but of no consequence, calm long term culture improvement, indignation with injustice, inner autonomy and outer acceptance. Transcend the environment rather than just cope.
Imperfections
Painfully aware of own imperfections, joyfully aware of own growth process. Impatient with self when stuck, real life pain, not imagined.
Values
Philosophical acceptance of the nature of his self, human nature, social life, nature, physical reality, remains realistically human.
Resolution of dichotomies
Polar opposites merge into a third, higher phenomenon, as though the two have united, work becomes play, most childlike person is most wise, opposite forces no longer felt as a conflict. Desires are in excellent accord with reason.
Maslow says there are two processes necessary for self-actualization: self exploration and action. The deeper the self exploration, the closer one comes to self-actualization.

EIGHT WAYS TO SELF ACTUALIZE

Experience things fully, vividly, selflessly. Throw yourself into the experiencing of something: concentrate on it fully, let it totally absorb you.
Life is an ongoing process of choosing between safety (out of fear and need for defense) and risk (for the sake of progress and growth): Make the growth choice a dozen times a day.
Let the self emerge. Try to shut out the external clues as to what you should think, feel, say, and so on, and let your experience enable you to say what you truly feel.
When in doubt, be honest. If you look into yourself and are honest, you will also take responsibility. Taking responsibility is self-actualizing.
Listen to your own tastes. Be prepared to be unpopular.
Use your intelligence, work to do well the things you want to do, no matter how insignificant they seem to be.
Make peak experiencing more likely: get rid of illusions and false notions. Learn what you are good at and what your potentialities are not.
Find out who you are, what you are, what you like and don't like, what is good and what is bad for you, where you are going, what your mission is. Opening yourself up to yourself in this way means identifying defenses--and then finding the courage to give them up.
SELF ACTUALIZATION
Maslow (1954), believed that man has a natural drive to healthiness, or self actualization. He believed that man has basic, (biological and psychological) needs that have to be fulfilled in order to be free enough to feel the desire for the higher levels of realization. He also believed that the organism has the natural, unconscious and innate capacity to seek its needs. (Maslow 1968)

In other words, man has an internal, natural, drive to become the best possible person he can be.

"...he has within him a pressure toward unity of personality, toward spontaneous expressiveness, toward full individuality and identity, toward seeing the truth rather than being blind, toward being creative, toward being good, and a lot else. That is, the human being is so constructed that he presses toward what most people would call good values, toward serenity, kindness, courage, honesty, love, unselfishness, and goodness." (Maslow, 1968, p. 155.)
Maslow believed that not only does the organism know what it needs to eat to maintain itself healthy, but also man knows intuitively what he needs to become the best possible, mentally healthy and happy "being". I use the word "being" because Maslow goes far beyond what the average person considers good physical and mental health. He talked about higher consciousness, esthetic and peak experiences, and Being. He stressed the importance of moral and ethical behavior that will lead man naturally to discovering, becoming himself.
"The state of being without a system of values is psychopathogenic, we are learning. The human being needs a framework of values, a philosophy of life, a religion or religion-surrogate to live by and understand by, in about the same sense he needs sunlight, calcium or love. This I have called the "cognitive need to understand." The value- illnesses which result from valuelessness are called variously anhedonia, anomie, apathy, amorality, hopelessness, cynicism, etc., and can become somatic illness as well. Historically, we are in a value interregnum in which all externally given value systems have proven failures (political, economic, religious, etc.) e.g., nothing is worth dying for. What man needs but doesn't have, he seeks for unceasingly, and he becomes dangerously ready to jump at any hope, good or bad. The cure for this disease is obvious. We need a validated, usable system of human values that we can believe in and devote ourselves to (be willing to die for), because they are true rather than because we are exhorted to "believe and have faith." Such an empirically based Weltanschauung seems now to be a real possibility, at least in theoretical outline." (Maslow, 1968, p. 206.)
Morality then is natural. If we use our capacity to think, are honest, sincere and open, we arrive at moral and ethical behavior naturally. The problem is to not destroy our ability to become ourselves.
"Pure spontaneity consists of free, uninhibited uncontrolled, trusting, unpremeditated expression of the self, i.e., of the psychic forces, with minimal interference by consciousness. Control, will, caution, self-criticism, measure, deliberateness are the brakes upon this expression made intrinsically necessary by the laws of the social and natural world, and secondarily, made necessary by the fear of the psyche itself." (1968, p. 197.)
To me, this means listening to the inner self, the unconscious, the spirit.
"This ability of healthier people to dip into the unconscious and preconscious, to use and value their primary processes instead of fearing them, to accept their impulses instead of always controlling them, to be able to regress voluntarily without fear, turns out to be one of the main conditions of creativity."
"This development toward the concept of a healthy unconscious and of a healthy irrationality, sharpens our awareness of the limitations of purely abstract thinking, of verbal thinking and of analytic thinking. If our hope is to describe the world fully, a place is necessary for preverbal, ineffable, metaphorical, primary process, concrete-experience, intuitive and esthetic types of cognition, for there are certain aspects of reality which can be cognized in no other way." (p. 208)

Meditation, self-hypnosis, imagery and the like are sources of discovering our inner being. To become self-actualized, Maslow said we need two things, inner exploration and action.
"An important existential problem is posed by the fact that self-actualizing persons (and all people in their peak- experiences) occasionally live out-of-time and out-of-the- world (atemporal and aspatial) even though mostly they must live in the outer world. Living in the inner psychic world (which is ruled by psychic laws and not by the laws of outer-reality), i.e., the world of experience, of emotion, of wishes and fears and hopes, of love of poetry, art and fantasy, is different from living in and adapting to the non-psychic reality which runs by laws he never made and which are not essential to his nature even though he has to live by them. (He could, after all, live in other kinds of worlds, as any science fiction fan knows.) The person who is not afraid of this inner, psychic world, can enjoy it to such an extent that it may be called Heaven by contrast with the more effortful, fatiguing, externally responsible world of "reality," of striving and coping, of right and wrong, of truth and falsehood. This is true even though the healthier person can also adapt more easily and enjoyably to the "real" world, and has better "reality testing," i.e., doesn't confuse it with his inner psychic world." (p. 213)
Maslow has made a case for natural, human goodness. Man is basically good, not evil, he has the capacity to be an efficient, healthy and happy person. But he must nurture the capacity with awareness, honesty, introspection and maintain his freedom: to freely respond to internal and external events (values), to be himself at all costs.
The knowledge that man has this capacity motivates him to realize it. It also obliges him to actively work toward self realization. We cannot not respond to the call that a value makes on us. This whole discussion shows the importance of studying Values and Ethics. We are obliged to discover the range of our possible moral behavior. If we are capable of being healthy and happy, then we are obliged to work toward that goal.

Dan Rodgerson


19 Reasons to ignore everyone else and folow your dreams - Dan Rodgerson

1.The only “yes” you need to follow your dreams is yours.
2.You’ll regret it later in life, and if you’re delaying it, you’ll question yourself why didn’t you do it sooner.
3.Not following your dreams makes you feel unaccomplished. Eventually, this will stop you from dreaming altogether.
4.It will attract some attention, even from the naysayers ad haters. You will feel strong as you prove the naysayers wrong. As Walter Bagehot said; “The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.”
5.People who follow their dreams are doers. Doers have more power to create, influence, and change their environment… and eventually the world.
6.Life feels more memorable, hence you feel/become more memorable.
7.Following your dreams might take unexpected turns, but those are the interesting and memorable challenges of living the dream.
8.Those challenges will help you grow as they make you step out of your comfort zone.
9.Dreams make you take chances, but chances can bring more opportunities.
10.Afraid about it? Good. Being afraid makes you feel more alive, so smash through that brick wall of fear. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Elbert Hubbard once said, “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.”
11.Your dreams and your actions define you. Don’t let others define you with what they tell you to do and not to.
12.You will inspire other to follow their own dreams, even if they know nothing about you.
13.Following your dreams makes you interesting.
14.Who doesn’t love to challenge the status quo?
15.There are no rules in life so why limit yourself to what everybody else is doing?
16.Accomplishing your dreams will spark even bigger dreams.
17.You feel you have something more to live for.
18.Even if your dreams fail, you’ll feel proud you gave it your all to accomplish them. Dreamers tend to fail, but they tend to learn more in life. You learn from failure. So, dust yourself and try it again.
19.It’s your life, live it under your terms!

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The 9 Epiphanies That Shifted My Perspective ForeverPosted by Eric Allen Bell -Dan Rodgerson

1. You are not your mind.


The first time I heard somebody say that, I didn’t like the sound of it one bit. What else could I be? I had taken for granted that the mental chatter in my head was the central “me” that all the experiences in my life were happening to.



I see quite clearly now that life is nothing but passing experiences, and my thoughts are just one more category of things I experience. Thoughts are no more fundamental than smells, sights and sounds. Like any experience, they arise in my awareness, they have a certain texture, and then they give way to something else.



If you can observe your thoughts just like you can observe other objects, who’s doing the observing? Don’t answer too quickly. This question, and its unspeakable answer, are at the center of all the great religions and spiritual traditions.



2. Life unfolds only in moments.


Of course! I once called this the most important thing I ever learned. Nobody has ever experienced anything that wasn’t part of a single moment unfolding. That means life’s only challenge is dealing with the single moment you are having right now. Before I recognized this, I was constantly trying to solve my entire life — battling problems that weren’t actually happening. Anyone can summon the resolve to deal with a single, present moment, as long as they are truly aware that it’s their only point of contact with life, and therefore there is nothing else one can do that can possibly be useful. Nobody can deal with the past or future, because, both only exist as thoughts, in the present. But we can kill ourselves trying.



3. Quality of life is determined by how you deal with your moments, not which moments happen and which don’t.


I now consider this truth to be Happiness 101, but it’s amazing how tempting it still is to grasp at control of every circumstance to try to make sure I get exactly what I want. To encounter an undesirable situation and work with it willingly is the mark of a wise and happy person. Imagine getting a flat tire, falling ill at a bad time, or knocking something over and breaking it — and suffering nothing from it. There is nothing to fear if you agree with yourself to deal willingly with adversity whenever it does show up. That is how to make life better. The typical, low-leverage method is to hope that you eventually accumulate power over your circumstances so that you can get what you want more often. There’s an excellent line in a Modest Mouse song, celebrating this side-effect of wisdom: As life gets longer, awful feels softer.




4. Most of life is imaginary.


Human beings have a habit of compulsive thinking that is so pervasive that we lose sight of the fact that we are nearly always thinking. Most of what we interact with is not the world itself, but our beliefs about it, our expectations of it, and our personal interests in it. We have a very difficult time observing something without confusing it with the thoughts we have about it, and so the bulk of what we experience in life is imaginary things. As Mark Twain said: “I’ve been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” The best treatment I’ve found? Cultivating mindfulness.



5. Human beings have evolved to suffer, and we are better at suffering than anything else.


Yikes. It doesn’t sound like a very liberating discovery. I used to believe that if I was suffering it meant that there was something wrong with me — that I was doing life “wrong.” Suffering is completely human and completely normal, and there is a very good reason for its existence. Life’s persistent background hum of “this isn’t quite okay, I need to improve this,” coupled with occasional intense flashes of horror and adrenaline are what kept human beings alive for millions of years. This urge to change or escape the present moment drives nearly all of our behavior. It’s a simple and ruthless survival mechanism which works exceedingly well for keeping us alive, but it has a horrific side effect: human beings suffer greatly by their very nature. This, for me, redefined every one of life’s problems as some tendril of the human condition. As grim as it sounds, this insight is liberating because it means: 1) that suffering does not necessarily mean my life is going wrong, 2) that the ball is always in my court, so the degree to which I suffer is ultimately up to me, and 3) that all problems have the same cause and the same solution.



6. Emotions exist to make us biased.


This discovery was a complete 180 from my old understanding of emotions. I used to think my emotions were reliable indicators of the state of my life — of whether I’m on the right track or not. Your passing emotional states can’t be trusted for measuring your self-worth or your position in life, but they are great at teaching you what it is you can’t let go of. The trouble is that emotions make us both more biased and more forceful at the same time. Another survival mechanism with nasty side-effects.



7. All people operate from the same two motivations: to fulfill their desires and to escape their suffering.


Learning this allowed me to finally make sense of how people can hurt each other so badly. The best explanation I had before this was that some people are just bad. What a cop-out. No matter what kind of behavior other people exhibit, they are acting in the most effective way they are capable of (at that moment) to fulfill a desire or to relieve their suffering. These are motives we can all understand; we only vary in method, and the methods each of us has at our disposal depend on our upbringing and our experiences in life, as well as our state of consciousness. Some methods are skillful and helpful to others, others are unskillful and destructive, and almost all destructive behavior is unconscious. So there is no good and evil, only smart and dumb (or wise and foolish.) Understanding this completely shook my long-held notions of morality and justice.



8. Beliefs are nothing to be proud of.


Believing something is not an accomplishment. I grew up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they’re really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because “strength of belief” is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you’ve made it a part of your ego. Listen to any “die-hard” conservative or liberal talk about their deepest beliefs and you are listening to somebody who will never hear what you say on any matter that matters to them — unless you believe the same. It is gratifying to speak forcefully, it is gratifying to be agreed with, and this high is what the die-hards are chasing. Wherever there is a belief, there is a closed door. Take on the beliefs that stand up to your most honest, humble scrutiny, and never be afraid to lose them.



9. Objectivity is subjective.


Life is a subjective experience and that cannot be escaped. Every experience I have comes through my own, personal, unsharable viewpoint. There can be no peer reviews of my direct experience, no real corroboration. This has some major implications for how I live my life. The most immediate one is that I realize I must trust my own personal experience, because nobody else has this angle, and I only have this angle. Another is that I feel more wonder for the world around me, knowing that any “objective” understanding I claim to have of the world is built entirely from scratch, by me. What I do build depends on the books I’ve read, the people I’ve met, and the experiences I’ve had. It means I will never see the world quite like anyone else, which means I will never live in quite the same world as anyone else — and therefore I mustn’t let outside observers be the authority on who I am or what life is really like for me. Subjectivity is primary experience — it is real life, and objectivity is something each of us builds on top of it in our minds, privately, in order to explain it all. This truth has world-shattering implications for the roles of religion and science in the lives of those who grasp it.

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5 questions when you are not sure what you want out of life. Dan Rodgerson


1. What if I didn’t have to search and know what I want right now?
Searching causes us to look for something “out there” in order to fill a perceived sense of lack, when what may serve us more right now is to simply be in the emptiness.

When something is ripe and ready, it will come to us as an insight, a direct “knowing,” as if from a higher place beyond the mind.

As if from nowhere, we feel in our hearts an unquestioning “Yes!”

In the effort of “trying to find,” we jut out into the future. Yet, it’s really in the present moment where we actually discover it.

Looking back, I realize there were many important things I learned while helping my husband with his business that helped me in the business of publishing my book.

It was all divinely perfect.

2. What if I didn’t have to force change to happen?
I used to love puzzles, but those 1,000+ piece puzzles, where all the pieces looked alike, freaked me out. I remember out of frustration picking up a piece and trying to force it to the fit in the puzzle.

You know exactly where this got me.

We can’t force something to come, but we can set our intention for it. I set an intention to write and publish books 10 years before it actually happened. But during that time, I gathered all the pieces I needed to create my first project, including the content, the personal experience, and the inner–growth.

One day, beyond my control, all the pieces came together for a moment and fit.

3. What if I focus on how I can help others?
Even if you don’t know exactly what you want next, you can start by helping other people, in a way that feels meaningful to you, and see where that leads you.

When we look at what we love doing and we combine it with the desire to help others, these two components come together and ignite like a match against a surface.

4. What if I could let go?

What if you could let go of the need to know it or discover it right now?

This is not about resolving yourself or giving up on a dream. But when we drop the grasping and the need to have it, we give ourselves some room to breathe.

Then we are freer to explore, to be inventive, and to create just for the pure sake of creating, without being attached to the dream having to come into form.

With some spaciousness, we feel more relaxed, and more able to meet the present moment and enjoy the process.

5. What if I could feel safe in the unknown?
Unfortunately, my mother who has cancer goes in and out of the hospital almost every three weeks for chemo treatments.

Every day when I see or speak to her, I get the same unbelievable attitude. While waiting for news from recent tests, she always surrenders to the unknown.

“Mom, how do you do this?” I asked wanting to learn. “Isn’t it hard to wait like this—in the unknown?”

As if I asked a silly question, she responded quickly, “That’s what we all do, Lynn, all the time. That’s what life is.”

“How did you get so wise?” I asked. “How can you be so patient?”

“That’s all we can do,” she responded. “We have no other choice. One step at a time”

For my Mom, it’s more like “Don’t sweat the big stuff.” The small details are where she can gain some sort of control.

She likes her coffee poured two inches into the cup and microwaved for thirty seconds. Her day planner, Chapstick, and crossword puzzles are stacked neatly to the left on the hospital bedside table, and the phone sits on the bed next to her hip for easy access.

She always put out a bowl of mini Snickers, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, and Three Musketeers, as a gesture of gratitude for the hospital staff, doctors, and nurses.

Doing what she can, creating a simple daily structure within the uncertainty of the unknown makes her feel safe.

During a time of uncertainty, remind yourself to let go of the big stuff and focus instead on what is in front of you now.

I admirably think of my mom, determined to build her strength daily by walking rounds, smiling and carting her chemo drip on the hospital floor. It reminds me of what life is all about:

“One step at a time,” as my wise mother says. That’s how we experience the uncertainty of the unknown.

So, what small step might you take? What simple thing might you do to embrace the fullness of your life today?

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10 Instant Emotional Fitness Tools - Dan Rodgerson

10 Instant Emotional Fitness Tools
By Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D.
Created Nov 26 2010 - 11:45am
When things get out of control and you momentarily lose your emotional balance, there are any number of little things you can do to regain it. Here are ten tools to help get you started.

1. Wash your hands and face and brush your teeth. It cools and cleans the parts of your body that you use most frequently, which is relaxing, and gives you that "fresh start" feeling.


2. Put on clean socks and some shoes that you haven't worn in a few days. Shoes take a day or two to release any moisture they have absorbed, and this is a very easy way to put a little pep back into your step.


3. Give yourself a good shave (face or legs). This is another instant refresher. Especially if you have sensitive skin or the weather is dry. Plus, when we know we are looking our best, we naturally feel better.


4. Look at any trophy, diploma, or certificate of achievement that you have earned. And if it isn't framed and on the wall, frame it now. These are reminders of your accomplishments, and taking in your success is important to maintaining your self-esteem.


5. Remember your last (or greatest) success and think about it for sixty seconds. Taking in your success as often as possible will help you reach another and another. Quite simply, it reminds you that if you've done it before, you can do it again.


6. Know you are the person your loved ones think you are. And yes, that goes for your dog too. Knowing that you are unconditionally loved can't help but make you feel good about yourself. It's so easy to beat yourself up, I recommend pulling yourself up instead.


7. Wash your car, inside and out. Hey, when our wheels are shiny, we feel better. If you don't think this applies to you, just remember how you felt the last time you got a ride in someone's very funky car. Race you to the car wash.


8. Organize your closet and get rid of anything that no longer fits. Old clothes may come back into style, but you really don't want them on hangers for the next twenty years. Throwing out the old makes room for the new. For some, the feeling they get from putting on a new "power suit" fills them with pride.


9. Cook a lovely meal. Even if you are by yourself, preparing a tasty dinner, setting the table, and treating yourself to a wonderful culinary experience will lift your spirits. Sharing it with someone you love and/or respect will make it even more nurturing.


10. Look around you, remember that you started with nothing, and know that everything you see, you created. We can all lose our feelings of self-worth, especially when something goes wrong in our world. The truth is that if you have done it before, you can do it again-no matter what.

None of these tasks has to be uncomfortable or take you much time. Finding ways to give yourself a little boost when you're not feeling like you're at the top of your game is a trick that truly happy people use on a regular basis.

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The Importance of Goal Setting -Dan Rodgerson

The Importance of Goal Setting

Column by Janine Popick, Inc.com "Girl Power Female CEO's"
August 5, 2010

Your employees would love to know what they can do to not only be successful themselves, but to help the company succeed. The top goals are usually around revenue, profitability and customer growth.

When I started VerticalResponse in 2001, we had 3 employees. And our goals were as follows: to get as much stuff done every day as we possibly could. It’s probably not the right way to do things but we were so small and nimble it had to be the way to do it.

Slow-forward to 2010, with close to 100 employees. That’s not the way you can do things now. Everyone’s job has gotten a bit “nichier” and focused and we are looking at what things that need to get done at all levels to attain our overall goals. And I’m not talking about just your senior-level managers, I’m talking setting quantitative goals at all levels of your business.

So now we’ve got a lot of hardworking doers that would love to know from us what they can do to not only be successful themselves, but to help the company succeed. And unlike in 2001, they don’t necessarily know where to begin.

That’s your job. And your goals need to be SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Timely).

The first thing you have to do is to define your company goals. The top goals are usually around revenue, profitability and customer growth. You might also have goals about improved employee retention.

How can Sally help? Since Sally might be talking to customers the most, you might utilize her to do some marketing.

•Ask Sally to establish how much traffic you got last month and increase it by 10 percent—whether it be traffic to your location or your website.
•Find out how many times your business sent out a newsletter last month. Tell her you’d like a better customer response this month shown by an open rate increase of 10 percent, or you’d like her to add one more email campaign to the mix. This might also help drive that 10 percent traffic she needs.
•Finally if you don’t already have them, ask Sally to set up a Facebook & Twitter account to get more traffic and drive 100 new followers each month for each account. Also tell her you’d like her to post every day about something interesting.
How can Jason help?
•Since Jason is a bit more operational and is familiar with your books, you might ask him to find 3 places where he thinks he can cut costs this month.
•If you’ve got goals around improved employee retention, you might also ask him to look at better benefits if your business offers them, and ask him to do an employee survey this month to find how employees are feeling about the company.
If you measure your goals quarterly, halfway through the quarter sit down with staff and find out where they are and what you can do to help. If it’s monthly do a quick check in halfway through the month. If you’ve got a great relationship with them, they’ll have probably already told you of any issues that came up to prevent them from getting to these goals. Remember, if the goals are measureable and actionable and support the overall goals of the company, you’ll know pretty quickly if they’re on their way to attaining the goals you set. And more importantly, they’ll feel like they’ve contributed a big part towards the success of the business.

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